Archive for the ‘Bizarre’ Category

Magic Monster by Heartland

Friday, October 30th, 2009

Well, it’s hard to believe, but I actually have a bunch of new info about that mysterious windup, musical demon lumberjack I was so excited about (and desperate for) weeks ago.

Monster video

I’m not sure if you recall, but in that video, we saw a freaky, distorting, rubber face placed on an animatronic, musical lumberjack-type of character (I’m calling him a lumberjack because he’s wielding an axe and he’s wearing boots and overalls).

The thing was so bizarre, I could’ve sworn it was “homemade.” I kind of recognized the look of the rubbery-face and figured it was a finger puppet placed on some weird holiday toy or something.

That lead to my search and discovery of this generic set of rubber-faced finger puppets.

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Finger Puppets

Jackpot! Not only did I get some weird-looking little finger puppets, but it appears that the demon-looking character from the video is in the bunch.

Okay, now that I’ve acquired the rubber faces, all I needed is the strange lumberjack toy.

Well, thanks to the help of some of you readers and a little bit of detective work, I discovered that this toy is called “Magic Monster.” Once I’d acquired that information, it would only be a matter of time before the toy gods sent this Magic Monster my way.

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Magic Monster Magic Monster

Luckily for me, when the monster reared its ugly face, it came fully-functioning and complete with its original box. (Thanks toy gods!)

It’s not a lumberjack toy at all. It is, in fact, simply a nonsensical, axe-wielding monster that sways back-and-forth to the tune of “When the Saints Go Marching In.” Who’d have thunk it?

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Magic Monster

Not only that, but I also discovered the face on the original toy isn’t the one in the video, so I was correct in assuming the video was a “custom” job. I never expected this face to be on the toy.

Wow? That’s one ugly son of a bitch.

And just as I thought – the “head” of the toy actually has a few protruding pegs which stretch the removable, rubbery face stretch, bringing it to life.

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Magic Monster

Here’s a full figure view for ya. I kinda feel that they cheaped it with the head sculpt. I know there were probably some technical limitations, but the round helmet dome thing just isn’t cutting it.

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Magic Monster Magic Monster

And as you may have guessed, the animatronic head perfectly accommodates the “finger holes” of the various face puppets.

This is too perfect.

Do you know what this means? I can bring each face to life, giving the freaky axe maniac multiple personalities.

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Magic Monster

We’ve got the demon-looking guy.

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Magic Monster

The angry, mustached man, who actually looks like an axe murder (or angry lumberjack).

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Magic Monster

The crazy old man (or is that Michael Berryman)

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Magic Monster

And here we have the creepy child molester. (This guy’s probably scarier than the original monster.)

You think they look cool as stills? Wait ’til you see ‘em in action.

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Magic Monster

I’ve gotta warn ya though. The music in these videos will get on your nerves. “When the Saints Go Marching In” plays loudly from a speaker in his feet. Not only that, but you have the obnoxious internal mechanism of the toy continuously grinding while the song is playing . It’s basically every parents’ nightmare.

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Monster video

Also notice the axe has a light in it and glows red. Scaaary.

I noticed my monster toy’s axe is facing forward and not sideways as featured on the box and even in that other video. Hm.

So, which one is your favorite? I think I like the mustached guy best. He just looks right in those clothes… plus his mouth full of teeth really makes his head movements more pronounced and lifelike. Now all I need is some more cool rubbery finger puppets. Any thoughts on where to find them?

After seeing this toy and these puppets. it begs the question: Which came first? Were the faces/puppets made for automated toys like Magic Monster, or was the toy made to accommodate the finger puppets that were already being produced?

The finger puppets don’t have much as far as markings go. All I can see is “® 986012 Made in China.”

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Magic Monster Magic Monster

Here’s all the info taken from the Magic Monster box:

  • Magic Monster
  • Face with a thousand changes
  • An axe that lights up
  • Moves from side to side
  • Even plays music (the saints go marching in)
  • 1/#21828C
  • ©1985 Justen
  • “transformable face”

(Check out that front panel. They’ve totally masked out the big dome head behind the monster’s face. Bull. The toy looks so much better with just the floating face. And did you notice the “©1985 Justen?” Weird, huh?)

Actually, there is one other question this toy makes me ask: What the hell?

Buy rare monster toys on eBay!

Buy rubber finger puppets on eBay!

Musical Wind-Up Demon Lumberjack

Sunday, September 6th, 2009

Can someone please tell me what this thing is and where I can buy one?


Speelgoed uit de hel | Flabber
Please.

I’m begging you.

I’ve just re-discovered it while sorting through old e-mail. (Thanks, Antonio, for the link)

Any tips would be greatly appreciated ;)

Robot Fondles Boobs

Tuesday, March 17th, 2009

I’m sure some of you have seen this article at Gizmodo.

Apparently, there’s been a sighting in Japan of one of those classic claw machines filled with a pile of squishy, novelty breasts. Pretty unique… and weird. Thought I’d share.

Boob machine

I guess they’re just perverted stress relievers (or sexual frustration enhancers). The only bad thing is, once you win one from the claw machine, you’ll have to spend another however-many-dollars to get a second one. What good are toy boobs if not in pairs?

Now that I think about it, I recently saw some of these for sale at a flea market I recently attended. I just kind of dismissed them. I probably should’ve given away free Boob-balls instead of free Madballs.

Weirdo Google Searches

Sunday, March 8th, 2009

As you may know, a lot of folks who have websites track their stats, visitors, etc. using Google Analytics. I do the same. I’ve been using it since I started the blog.

Google Analytics really does present a lot of info – stuff like where my visitors are from, what pages they looked at and for how long. A really interesting and even comedic feature for me is the Traffic Sources: Keywords category. It lists what terms were searched in Google that brought individuals to my site. Most searches are what you might expect – stuff like “Madballs,” “Zombie Toy,” “Bootleg Toys,” etc.

Well, mixed in the bunch are totally off-the-wall surprises that I’ve been sharing on Twitter. Due to some fan reactions, I thought maybe I’d let you all in on it too. So, I’m gonna try something goofy on the blog and share a top-10 list of weirdo Google searches. Not sure if it’ll be monthly or weekly or what. Maybe I’ll just do it as funny things come up.

Weirdo Searches

Here are the Top 10 weird search terms from March 1-7, 2009:

10. “battlestar galactica nude”

9. ” just another happy meal”

8. “this guy is like the terminator”

7. ” why are people scared of the abominable snowman”

6. “scary toys no fur gallery”

5. “ugly balls”

4. “big toys in ass”

3. “ass lips”

2. “claymation of clown smelling finger from ass”

(looks like Weirdo Toys gets a lot of ‘ass’)

… and my favorite….

1. “am i weird because i collect toys”

Yeah, I know #2 is pretty disturbing, but you have to admit, #1 is pretty funny.

You know what would be great? Some kind of screwed up scavenger hunt where the readers of the blog have to find toys that relate to these search terms. Or maybe a custom-toy contest. Man that would be freaky and hilarious.

Take me to your Imperious Leader.

Wednesday, December 17th, 2008

So, here it is – Part 2 of my toy-finds at the Greater York Toy Extravaganza. Let’s keep it simple and just itemize what makes this toy so weird.

Ready?

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

1. Freaky alien fish face

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

2. Big, purple, 70s afro

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

3. Flippers for hands

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

4. Weird, split, flippery things for feet

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

5. Weird, cracking neck thing

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

6. And she’s completely nude (I’m calling her “she,” because she’s pink, dainty and just kind of girly looking.)

She actually looks like a crabby, old, alien grandma.

I saw this little gal at a guy’s booth. And I literally exclaimed to the guy, “What the hell is this thing, and how much is it?!” The guy kindly rejected my enthusiasm with a slight shrug of his shoulders, walked over to his buddy, mumbled with him a bit, came back over and simply told me, “It’s from Battlestar Galactica and it’s $5.”

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Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

So what do you think? Worth the five bucks? I dunno. It’s a bit run down and scraped-up. I’d usually pay one or two bucks for something like this, but I guess I was eager to buy since I’d never seen it before. I have since tried to convince myself that the wear-and-tear of the toy gives it more “character.” Who am I kidding? I could’ve gotten this toy MOC (that’s mint-on-card for all you non-dorky types) for $10 probably.

Well, it didn’t take long, but I did find more info about the toy. It’s Imperious Leader from the Battlestar Galactica toyline released by Mattel in 1978.

Imperial Leader of Battlestar Galactica

Looks like I’m missing the cape/shroud thingy.

Wow! With the blanket accessory, the alien grandma look is complete. You know how cold grandma is all the time. Maybe we need to get her a Snuggie, so she can drink tea and stay warm at the same time.

Ya know… now that I think about it, maybe the nude alien is best. That way we get to see all the hidden freakiness.

I never really watched Battlestar Galactica (classic or modern era) or cared about any of the toys, so I’m not really familiar with this character or what her role is in the show. I guess she’s a bad guy. Probably the leader of the Cylons. The description on the package actually reads: “Sinister mastermind from the TV Space Saga!” But how imperious of a leader or sinister of a mastermind could you possibly be if you have no opposable thumbs or even sleeves to let your flippers out?

Imperial Leader as Rick James

Oh, and one last thing.

Is it just me, or does that hairstyle look like it’s really inspired by Jheri Curl? Classic.

Buy Imperious Leader toys on eBay!