Archive for the ‘Cartoons’ Category

Bert & Mickey Coin Banks

Monday, February 23rd, 2009

As most of you know (and as some have felt), the world’s “financial situation” isn’t too great right now. Here in the U.S., folks are saying we’re in a recession (I think the media helped perpetuate that status with their incessant fear mongering, but nonetheless, that’s where we are). I know a lot of folks are losing jobs and homes, so I feel extremely fortunate to still have my job and home, and I even have the time and money to maintain this goofy blog.

… which leads us to our theme for today’s entry – Money. To be more precise – saving money.

No, I’m not gonna be providing any cost-saving tips for toy collectors or anything like that (God knows you can’t get cheaper than some of the crap I’ve picked up over the years). I’m actually referring to something I’d never imagined would be on the Weirdo Toys blog – coin banks.

What better way to save money for weirdo toys than by placing loose change in a couple of other weirdo toys.

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Bert Bank Mickey Mouse Bank

I came across these two beauties at the York Toy Show, and they just kept chanting, “Put me on the blog. Put me on the blog. Put me on the blog….”

Bert Bank

As you may have noticed, the first bank posted there is Bert (or seems to be).
Of course we all know him from the children’s show, Sesame Street. He hangs out with his buddy (or brother… or lover), Ernie.

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Bert Bank

As you may have noticed, Bert’s a bit off-model. With his round, red clown nose and military-style buzz cut he’s not as cute and “muppety” as his TV show depiction.

Look! He even has a slight smirk. Bert should NEVER show emotion (other than frustration or anger)!

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Bert Bank

This Bert is just awkward. He appears to be more squatty than I’d ever imagined. In fact, he’s so short, he’s having to pull up his long shirt so he doesn’t step on it… and his shirt’s totally the wrong color. It looks like it’s striped, but I guess the manufacturer couldn’t afford more than four stripes (according to his markings, this guy was made by New York Vinyl Prod. Corp. in 1971).

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Bert Bank

Actually, now that we have a better look at the the back, it actually looks like Bert is holding a towel around his waste. What the hell? I know Sesame Street had scenes of Ernie in the tub, but I never remember scenes of Bert in the shower. And as with all sub-par quality toys, only the front of the toy is painted (unless you count the full paint app of the hair).

He’s ugly and totally wrong, but that’s what I like about him. He just has a peculiar charm and is “off” just enough to make him intriguing. He’s a pretty good size too. He’s stands slightly taller than 12″, and he’s made of pretty sturdy plastic.

Bert Live
Weird Bert image courtesy of the True Feelings On The Closing of TMS Weblog. Thanks!

As a side note, I wanted to show you something I found while searching Google for images of Bert. It’s live-action Bert. Freaky.

Mickey Mouse

Next we have Disney’s Mickey Mouse. Arguably the most popular cartoon character in existence (also the most mind-numbingly dull). That’s why I was totally shocked when I found this little beauty.

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Mickey Mouse Bank Mickey Mouse Bank

I have to tell you a little bit about the guy I bought this from. I was strolling around the show, going table to table, and I came across this guy with a table full of vintage Mickey Mouse stuff. It was all super-old, antiquey and expensive. I could clearly see high price tags on most of the items there, so I was reluctant to even check the price on this ugly bank I spotted. I picked up the bank. Flipped it over. No price. Before I even had a chance to put it down, the guy blurts out “I’ll do a dollar on that!” I know I had to have a look of excitement in my eyes when I replied, “Really? Okay!! I’ll take it.” The guy paused for a second. I could see the gears turning in his head. He eventually spoke up again and asked “Wait. What is it? Why are you so interested in it?” I just laughed and simply told him, “Because it’s so horrible.” He joined in with some obligatory social laughter, but I could see the doubt and soon-to-be regret he was going to feel for the rest of the show… wondering just how much money he threw way by letting this jewel out of his possession for a mere dollar.

I’m sure the joke’s on me… but I think it’s worth the buck I paid for it. I hope you agree.

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Mickey Mouse Bank Mickey Mouse Bank

First thought – This thing is messed up. Seriously.

I’m pretty sure this thing isn’t a Disney product at all (thank goodness). Just look at it.

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Mickey Mouse Bank

Half-assed, off-register paint job, flimsy-ass plastic and a horribly sloppy, jagged seam. Harsh words I know, but it’s only because I love him so much.

Outside of that, I love that Mickey is wearing a little cap and long pants. He looks like a little jockey riding his big money bag.

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Mickey Mouse Bank

Only bad thing about the Mickey bank is that there’s no alternate opening to get the money out once you’ve filled the thing. There’s just the slot on top, so once the money is in there, it’s most likely not getting out (guess that’ll guarantee some savings).

Hey another side note. I normally don’t do this, but when I was Google-searching “Mickey Mouse” I came across this intriguing and hilarious photo of Mickey and Minnie Mouse at Mardi Gras. I just had to share it (This one’s dedicated to you Reis ;) ).

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Mickey Mouse Boobs

Maybe I should start a Weirdo Boobs blog?

Buy Bert toys on eBay!

Buy Mickey Mouse toys on eBay!

La Cosa de los Cuatro Fantásticos

Sunday, February 15th, 2009

Well, as you’ve seen here before (and I’m sure you’re bound to see again), I have some delightfully horrible Mexican bootlegs to share. (By the way, I hope that Spanish blog entry title is correct. I kind of guessed at it using Babelfish and Google. Who needs to bother learning multiple languages? ;) )

It’s great just seeing some Mexican sculptors’ attempts to create the likenesses of popular comic characters. These guys aren’t just bootlegging Marvel Legends toys, they are making custom sculptures (maybe even something that could be equated to limited edition designer vinyl), and they have their own personalities and unique stories to tell.

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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootlegs

Let me back up for a minute just to give the unknowing readers a quick rundown of what they’re looking at.

The Thing Comic Panels

This is “The Thing.”

(I threw in the Jack Kirby / Rob Liefeld drawing comparison just so the comic geeks out there can vomit ever-so-slightly. Well actually, that’ll make anyone vomit.)

I’m not sure if you all know of this character.

Roger Corman's Fantastic Four

The Thing is a member of the Fantastic Four – a group of scientist buddies that went into space, got zapped by cosmic rays and ended up a mutated bunch of freaks. Scientist, Ben Grimm (The Thing), turned into a big orange rock guy. A rock guy in his underwear. Oh, and they all star in their own comic published by Marvel Comics

Now that we’ve got that outta the way, let’s take a closer look at these bootlegs action figures one-by-one.

Crappy-Arm-Action Thing
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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

Okay. Is it just me, or does this guy appear naked at first glance? He has a belt, no genitalia, and darker legs. I guess that implies pants well enough.

He also has a “4″ sticker on his chest. Maybe he needed the 4 so we wouldn’t confuse him with any other of the Marvel character bootlegs.

Look at his funky blue eyes and blue mouth. Blue is a good color choice, I guess, since it’s the complement to orange, but it’s still kinda creepy. He’s glowing from the inside or something.

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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

So, this guy actually takes it up a notch (or is that down a notch?) when it comes to bootlegs. Whoever made this thing thought it’d be a good idea to make the arms connect by plastic a rod which is controlled by a small lever sticking out of the toy’s back. I guess it’s an “action feature.” Only thing is, it’s hard as hell to get it to move, and neither arm can move independently. Not only that, the pieces weren’t really made to fit together, so the rod is actually somehow forcing the toy’s shoulder/torso to pry open, making it even harder to maneuver the action feature. Kinda crummy.

Concave-Head Flack Thing
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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

All I can say is this bootleg ROCKS (pun intended). He’s not even really an “action figure.” He’s just a horribly, crappily, ridiculously, poorly-made mold-injected toy. He’s hollow, has no paint whatsoever, and flack all over… but at least he’s orange.

What does impress me though, is the fact that the sculpt is a cool, original take on the Thing. He’s a bit more cartoony with less of the “traditional” superhero proportions as seen in the previous bootleg.

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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

Look at this. Chunky, sloppy flack and a caved-in head. That’s some good bootleg craftsmanship ;)

Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

This Thing actually looks a bit like Michael Chiklis who played him in the movie. I don’t know if this photo captures it well, but in person, I thought I was looking at a bootleg Commish figure.

Rock Candy Thing
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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

Here we have little, cherry-flavored rocky candy Thing (I don’t mean that literally. He’s plastic and all. He just kind of reminded me of rock candy).  He’s just a solid, shiny, translucent chunk. Reminds me of those little PVC figures like M.U.S.C.L.E. or Smurfs or whatever.

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Fantastic Four's

One thing that caught my eye was the odd paint job. Look at his underpants. It almost looks like it was just applied minutes ago. Or it is still wet, because it isn’t chemically bonding with the plastic. Do you know what I’m talking about?

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Fantastic Four's

Poor guy. His face barely fits on his head.

Claymation Thing
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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

Last, and definitely not least, is my favorite of the bunch. The most goofy, quirky, fun version of the Thing I’ve ever seen. I wouldn’t be surprised to see this guy in a low-budget claymation version of the Fantastic Four.

He’s just so fun. A big, round, chunky, loveable, bright, fully-poseable Thing figure. He even has hand-painted underwear.

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Fantastic Four's - The Thing - Mexican Bootleg

I loved the startled look on his face. He must’ve just seen bootleg Invisible Girl in her invisible clothes.

And what’s up with the gray lips? Is it gravy? Porridge? Whatever it is, he’s just devoured it.

“It’s Slobberin’ Time!”

Buy The Thing toys on eBay!

The Abominable Snowman (aka “The Bumble”)

Wednesday, December 24th, 2008

I’m briefly interrupting my painfully slow revelation of the York Toy Show toys to feature a seasonal, Christmas toy.

I wanted to show you all a bizarre, freaky, strange Christmas toy like I did last year, but nothing really compares to a gyrating Mr. & Mrs. Claus in the bathtub.

I went to Wilsons 5¢-$1.00 to hopefully find something freaky again, but I had no luck. (I did see some more of the singing bathtub Clauses if anyone out there want’s one.) Plus, I’ve been pretty busy lately, so I haven’t had a lot of time to go searching for Christmas toys.

Mr. & Mrs. Claus in a tub

Eventually, I remembered that I already have some Christmas toys. I actually brought them to work years ago around Christmas time so my desk would be more seasonally festive (instead of scary). They’d slipped my mind, because I actually ended up lending the toys to my friend Megan (since my desk was so crowded and hers was so boring ;) ), and they’ve  lived at her desk for at least two years.

Maybe it’s not what you expected, but the toys I’m referring to are from the Rudolph and the Island of Misfit Toys toyline by Playing Mantis. They debuted years ago… probably 2001. They’ve been re-released over the years by a different company I think, because the quality of the toys seems cheaper. Cheapy plastic and paint jobs.

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer by Playing Mantis

My immediate thought was “I’ll feature the Bumble.” He’s cool, and I remember being scared of him as a kid. Then I thought, it’d be cool to feature some of the Misfit Toys that come packed along with the other figures from the toyline like Yukon Cornelius, Santa and Rudolph.

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Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Misfit Toys

Well, after setting them out to photograph them, I felt like they worked “conceptually” for the blog, but they are too visually boring or uninteresting to feature (so, I’ve included a photo, just to show you that you weren’t missing much).

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Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Abominable Snow Monster

The Bumble is cooler than those misfits.

He’s big, plastic and covered in white fur. He looks great. Is it just me or does he seem more cute, huggable and sane in this toy likeness? I think it was his whacked-out expressions, sharp teeth and roars that freaked me out as a kid. It seems like that’s been toned down a bit. They made him shorter and chubbier than he actually is in the animated classic. It’s been years since the cartoon, so I guess he’s been putting on the pounds since then.

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Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Abominable Snow Monster

His jaw even moves slightly, but not enough to make it look like he’s talking or anything. It’d be kind of neat (but totally unreasonable)  if the figure had removeable teeth like the cartoon. Maybe they’d snap in and out or something. You remember when Yukon pulled them all don’t you? It seems pretty damn raw/cruel now that i think about it, but as a kid, a toothless Bumble was a friendly Bumble.

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Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Abominable Snow Monster

I couldn’t find any clips of the old Rudolph Cartoon I liked on YouTube, but I did find this little gem. The intro does nothing for me, but the Bumble section makes me smile.

Enjoy, and have a Merry Christmas everybody (even though I just gave you a disappointing Christmas entry).

Hokuto no Ken Revolution – Exploding Member of Zeed

Wednesday, October 1st, 2008

Hello again. Sorry I haven’t had a new toy up in a while. I was away on vacation, and now I’ve finally gotten around to bringing you more weirdo toy goodness.

Speaking of weird, here’s a little something i recently ordered from Japan. It actually arrived a couple of weeks back, but I’m just now getting around to posting it. Sure, this guy doesn’t look too much out of the ordinary, but wait until you discover his little “secret.”

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

So, what we have here is the second in a new series of Hokuto no Ken – Revolution figures. In America, Hokuto no Ken is better known as Fist of the NorthStar. This character is a apparently a member of the gang called Zeed (some bad guys from the series).

I am vaguely familiar with the Fist of the NorthStar series, but I’ve never been a fan of it. In fact, the only first-hand knowledge I ever had of the series was gathered in the old days of my playing Game Boy as a kid.

Fist of the Northstar Gameboy game

I had the mediocre Fist of the NorthStar fighting game. It was a pretty dull experience, but I really loved drawing the characters from the game booklet.

Well, if I knew then what I know now, I would’ve been even more disappointed in the game. From what I’ve recently gathered, Fist of the NorthStar is a Manga and Anime series that takes place in a post-apocalyptic world overrun by a bunch of bullies trying to take advantage of the weak and innocent. That’s where the main hero, Kenshiro, comes in. He’s your iconic, mysterious wanderer who comes into town, seeks out the trouble, and like most kung-fu movie heroes, he kicks ass.

Fist of the Northstar Manga and Anime

Well, maybe it’s not “ass kicking” as much as it is “face punching.”

Fist of the Northstar Anime

You see, Kenshiro has a gift. He can pummel the crap out of these bad guys which initially shows no effects… but a few seconds later, the bad guys’ bodies realize they have just been clobbered… which usually results in a spontaneous and gratuitous explosion of gore.

Check out this clip. It should make things a lot clearer for you.

That is where this toy’s secret comes in. Not only is he a decently poseable, post-apocalyptic gang member of Zeed…

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

… but he’s also a recent victim of Kenshiro…

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

… which means he has an awesome-exploding-transformation action feature. Now kids can reenact the brutal demise of this Fist of the NorthStar baddy. Good times!

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

Rewatch that video clip, and pay attention at the 2:08 mark. I looks like a Zeed member explosion in action.

Isn’t this disgusting?

I love it.

Look at the details on this guy –

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

- splattering blood and flailing spinal column

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

- separate, broken ribs

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

- flying intestines

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

- punched-in head w/ brains oozing out

It doesn’t get any better than that.

Lemme share just a few more things. Like I mentioned before, this toy is a Japanese import, but I think it’s coming to the U.S. soon. If I’m not mistaken, it will be available Dec. 30, 2008 (I couldn’t wait that long. Plus, I wanted to show you guys).

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

Once I received the toy, I was pretty excited. the figure is smaller and more light weight than I expected. I think it’s about 8″ tall with several swivel and ball joints. The figure  has a bunch of hinges too which are made to be loose. They come apart easily, but I think it’s just a safety precaution, so we don’t end up breaking the toy while transforming it. The figure also comes with a support stand (which i didn’t wanna use) and a bloody axe accessory.

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Fist of the Northstar - Zeed Gang Member Exploding Action Figure

One of the coolest things about the import is the box. It’s covered in a bunch of “gibberish” I don’t understand, but it looks cool. Plus, the box is re-closeable, which is great. Hopefully, the American release will do something similar for those that are “hard-core collectors” or whatever (I wasn’t really that worried about it).

So there you have it. The world’s first exploding action figure. It’s kind of like combining the fun of Transformers with the gore of McFarlane Toys figures. There should be a whole toyline of figures like this.

Transforming mutilation. That’s a bit sick isn’t it?

The New Adventures of He-Man – Hoove

Sunday, September 14th, 2008

Hey.

When I say “He-Man toys” you guys know what I’m talking about, right? I’m referring to “Masters of the Universe toys.”

Well, you may not have known this, but there’s actually a line of toys out there called “He-Man.” It’s a toyline from Mattel that was introduced in 1989.

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

What kid ever said, “Hey, I just got some cool, new Masters of the Universe Figures.”

I have a memory of seeing this new series in a store when I was a kid, and I recall thinking, “What the hell is up with these He-Man toys? They’re so small and puny.” (I think by the time these toys came around, I was done with the original series anyway.)

I wasn’t aware of it at the time, but apparently this new toy series (unsurprisingly) had a new cartoon series as well. It was called “The New Adventures of He-Man.” (this ain’t yer father’s He-Man). The animation in this clip isn’t so bad. It’s probably better than the rotoscoped, repetitive Filmation animation from the old days.

Looks like the folks at Mattel tried to spin He-Man in another direction. The new style of the series seems to have a focus on sci-fi with a hint of fantasy, instead of the fantasy with a hint of sci-fi we’d seen in the previous MOTU toyline.

The classic characters He-Man and Skeletor look pretty dumb (maybe it’s just because they don’t look like themselves), but the new bad guys are kinda quirky and unique. Unfortunately, the good guys are lame and generic as hell – just a bunch of humans in bad costumes.

Most of the characters have really bad names too. They are typoed pun versions of what their action is. Vizar? Lizorr? Karattii? Optikk? C’mon!

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Hoove - Package Art

The key differences between these guys and the original MOTU figures is their visual style/design. The figures are smaller, slimmer and have different knees joints and other actions referred to on the packaging as “Masters Action” (an obvious hint to the original series).

Well, as you’ve probably guessed by the packaging photos above, the toy I’m featuring today is Hoove – Skeletor’s designated puppy punter.

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

As you can easily infer by his name, his “masters action” is kicking. So, yeah… Hoove kicks… with his hooves… like a horse.

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Hoove - Package Art

You just have to hold his left leg in place, tilt his body, and he kicks his right leg either forward or backward.

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

Hoove is a green, slimy, snaggle-toothed, triangle-pupil-having alien-robot guy. He looks pretty plain as a simple, bald alien…

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

… but with his helmet in place, he becomes a real menacing goofball.

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

Another funny thing worth mentioning is Hoove’s gun. With the shape of his hand and the little hand harness wrapped around his fingers, he will always be shooting diagonally. Make sure you stand right in front of him if you don’t want to get shot.

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The New Adventures of He-Man - Hoove Action Figure

So, there’s one final thing worth noting. It’s the the inclusion of more illustration on the toy packaging. The front of the package has a full-body painting of each character in action, and the paintings are really well done.

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Hoove - Package Art

The back of the package is actually printed on a low-grade uncoated paper, so everything turns out looking dingy. There are even more illustrations back there though. The one worth noting is the bust portrait illustration of the character.

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Hoove - Package Art

It doesn’t make the toys or character design any better, but it is really great seeing hand-drawn illustrations on toy packaging. Most packaging nowadays uses photos or bad Photoshop illustration or something.