Do you have any semi-lame toys lying around? Like these guys – the Bubbly Chubbies.
(Click to enlarge)
The only reason I keep them around is because they are recalled Teletubbies knockoffs. Wouldn’t it be great if you could easily transform such cutesy-ass characters into something mildly disturbing?
You know, something like this?
(Click to enlarge)
Well, apparently you, can. All you need are some cheap-ass monster face rings.
(Click to enlarge)
These rings look like something you could find in those cheapy, import toy catalogs… like Oriental Trading Company.
I bought these rings on eBay, and once I’d received them, I realized I can instantly transform my “normal” toys into “weirdo” toys with the most minimal of effort. This transformation took very little time and money… About 5 seconds and 5 bucks. I just grabbed a ring. popped it over a toy’s head and voila! Instant weirdo.
I really love the look of the new and improved Bubbly Chubbies. Now they look more like “Grubbly Chubbies.”
(Click to enlarge)
This Chubby is now a wonky-eyed viking guy with high blood pressure and a pink, marshmallow body.
(Click to enlarge)
And we have a your standard screaming skull Chubby…
(Click to enlarge)
and we top it off with the always classic gore gag… the dangling eyeball Chubby.
After seeing how great these guys turned out, I figured I’d try the remaining rings on some other figures I had lying around.
(Click to enlarge)
This vintage Kermit figure becomes a naked, bug-eyed screamer.
(Click to enlarge)
The blue guy from “Voltron,” King Zarkon, becomes Satan in his formal wear.
(Click to enlarge)
And the green, alien guy from “Battlestar Galactica,” Ovion, becomes some weird raving, alien lunatic.
(Click to enlarge)
With that last one though, I have to admit – Ovion looks cooler and weirder without the ring/mask.
(Click to enlarge)
So, that’s about it. I just thought I’d share what originated as a cheapy, weird ring impulse buy actually ended up making some mildly interesting characters for my toy shelves at work.
You guys have any quick ring-faced figures you wanna share? I’d love to see ‘em.
You know what? I’m not the all-knowing weirdo toy guy you think I am. Sometimes it’s you guys who introduce me to cool, weird toys.
… And I thank you.
(Click to enlarge)
Like this guy for example. I never knew he existed.
This little gem of a toy came to me from a new virtual buddy of mine, Michael Bukowski. He’s the author of an awesome toy blog, Blarghhh Spot, dedicated solely to balls. Not just any kind of balls… mainly Madballs and other related bootlegs and knockoffs. You should definitely check it out.
Mike actually contacted me months ago proposing a toy trade (I always like getting those kind of emails).
(Click to enlarge)
Among the photos, I was really drawn to these awesome monster head things (I have no clue what they are, but they may appear again in a future blog entry)…
(Click to enlarge)
… and this awesome, Japanese Dracula bank called Hasty Dracula.
I immediately fell in love with the vintage manga design style. Not only that, but with a peculiar name like “Hasty Dracula,” I had to have it. I decided to trade. Luckily for me, I had some rare balls on hand.
(Click to enlarge)
I had these horribly ugly mini-sadballs in my possession…
Hasty Dracula would be mine. I was already pretty excited to get the toy/bank, but I didn’t know how great it was ’til I saw it in action.
I’ll let you see it for yourself.
I love how the bank is like a characterized Rube Goldberg device. You don’t just drop the money in the coin slot. That’d be too simple and no fun at all.
(Click to enlarge)
You actually drop a coin in Dracula’s back (notice the giant, red syringe – weird)…
(Click to enlarge)
… wind him up, and wait as he climbs his ladder…
(Click to enlarge)
… to undoubtedly accost his next victim.
Luckily for the lady, when Drac reaches the top of the ladder, he loses his balance and falls into a tree –
(Click to enlarge)
Depositing the coin into a slot in the tree.
What an awesome way to save a quarter.
For the small size of this bank (approx. 7″ tall), the automation is surprisingly accurate… and painfully slow (that’s why I jazzed up the video).
(Click to enlarge)
And once the bank is full, there’s a removable cap on the bottom where you can release all 6 coins you’ve saved. Ha!
There are a couple of drawbacks to this toy I’d like to mention. The first is the fact that I can’t remove the Dracula figure from the ladder. He’d be a cool little standalone wind-up vampire toy, and he’s forever imprisoned on his ladder. Unfair. I’ve tried prying him off that ladder, but it feels like I’ll break his arms if I push it much more. Damn.
(Click to enlarge)
The second drawback is the fact that the diorama is basically a thin piece of cardboard. I like the drawing, and it totally sets up the story, but I’m still disappointed. It’s kind of like the feeling I had as a kid when I saw that Cobra’s base was a glorified piece of cardboard.
Oh! Here’s a packaging pic I swiped from Tons-of-Toys.com. According to their site, the bank was released in the 80s by Toplay TPS Japan and distributed in Italy by ALES. (Dracula actually looks a bit like The Count from Sesame Street in that pic.)
In closing, I’m still left wondering why Dracula doesn’t just transform into a bat and fly to the window. It’d be a lot quicker, stealthier and a less painful landing. In fact, isn’t this approach the opposite of hasty? It takes time and effort to locate a ladder, set it up and climb up to the window. Not only that, but is he actually going to draw blood from her with that syringe instead of biting here? Maybe he’s not a vampire at all – just one of those goth, poseur wannabes! If that’s true, it makes this Dracula more of a knock-off Dracula. Perfect!
On the Weirdo Toys blog, it’s always been my mission to uncover rare and strange oddities, but this time I’m onto something really special.
I’ve just uncovered this undiscovered etching of a long-forgotten ancestor in our evolutionary heritage.
(Click to enlarge)
It looks like this new “creature” is a mutated step between gorillas and humans.
So, who gives a crap about rare creature etchings, right? We’re here for the toys! Well, as soon as I saw this drawing, I actually recognized the creature in the center there.
Check this out.
(Click to enlarge)
I actually have a toy of that exact skeleton. I dug it up last year in a toy excavation. Pretty coincidental.
But I have a feeling that the specimen I found is a rare, undead, zombie skeleton.
He looks a bit zombie-ish to me.
(Click to enlarge)
He’s got some tell-tale signs – like his glowing read eyes and his mouth full of bloody teeth.
If you take a closer look at his body, you’ll see some other strange anomalies like his big ol’ hands and tiny feet.
(Click to enlarge)
Check out his torso. What’s with that funky sternum and neck ventilation? And I’m guessing the pelvic vent and crotch cross-bones didn’t help in his survival.
(Click to enlarge)
And this is weird too. There are arbitrary bones growing on his shoulders and hips. What the hell?
I wish I knew what to call this guy. Maybe I should call him “Mortisapien.” (Lame. I know.)
….
Okay. Okay. enough of the B.S. here’s the real scoop on this toy.
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
I was actually lucky enough to receive this skeleton toy as a gift from The Godbeast when I bought a couple of Underworld Warriors figures from him last year. Thing is, I have no clue what the hell he is or where he comes from (and neither did The Godbeast). He’s an unmarked gray skeleton. I don’t think he’s a crappy bootleg, because he’s fairly well made. I base this primarily on his paint application. Look how well done the red strips between the ribs and vertebrae are. Even each individual tooth is painted. That would take some seriously skilled sweatshop laborers to paint like that.
So, if you happen to know anything about this toy, please share with the rest of us.
Until then, I’m claiming he’s a rare, blood-sucking, brain-eating zombie species.
You see these generic-looking super heroes? (The ones that look a lot like Playmobil?) They may look like true knock-offs or bootlegs of your favorite comic characters, but they are in fact a legit toyline from a legit Spanish toy company, Airgam.
“What the hell is Airgam” you may be asking? well, Airgam is a toy company that was established in 1976 and is best known for its miniature figures called Airgam Boys.
The Airgam Boys had various series which included themes such as Space, Romans, Cowboys, Sports, etc. One such category called “Airgam Comics: Super Stars” was released in 1985… which leads us to these guys – The Super Fantastics and Super Diabolics.
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
They’re a bunch of guys wearing capes, boots, gloves and what looks to be diapers on the outside of their pants. Not only that, but most of them are carrying guns. Even the good guys. I guess there’s a higher price to pay for crime in Spain – a bullet to the gut.
Looks like the series more or less uses all the same body parts and accessories. They just get different coloration, paint apps and stickers.
Let’s take a closer look at the figures shall we. We’ll start out with the Super Fantastics.
(Click to enlarge)
First of all, what’s up with that name? Ha! Sounds a lot like a bad English translation doesn’t it? It makes them that much more charming I guess. And this type treatment is so funky. Looks like some kind of street graffiti.
(Click to enlarge)
This is a rough bunch of super heroes. You’d think they were over sized, floating heads, arms and torsos hanging out with miniature, heavily-armed little people. It’s a pretty nasty-looking illustration – a weird mishmash up of all the characters piled on top of each other. The characters’ scale is all off, and the characters which appear to be in the background are overlapping characters in the foreground. It loses all sense of this thing being a “montage.”
Super Fantastics
(Click to enlarge)
The Fantastics characters I have to show you today are Stars Man, Bird Man, Red Masker and Captain Laser.
Stars Man
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Stars Man, is pretty much a Captain America ripoff if you ask me. Although, since he’s just a “stars” man, I guess his allegiance is the stars themselves and not necessarily to the United States. He could represent any country that really likes stars… or Astronomy.
Bird Man
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Bird Man seems to be the Batman ripoff. He’s got the big, bat ears… only thing is, he’s bird man. Birds don’t Have big ears like that. Not sure why they did that. They should’ve given him a beak or something.
Red Masker
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Ha! Now we have Red-Masker… which is probably the funniest name in the bunch. If you can’t come up with a good ripoff name for a Spider Man character then you shouldn’t be naming toys. Ha. Why “Red-Masker?” Couldn’t they have done something like “Arachna-Kid” or “Webbed-Wonder?” How’d they come up with the “Red Masker?” I can picture it now:
“Hey Berto… we need a name for this Spider Man-looking guy.”
“Is he wearing a mask?”
“Yeah.”
“What color is it?”
“Red.”
“Why don’t we just call him ‘Red-Mask?’”
“I dunno. Seems too lifeless. It’s not action-oriented enough. No real ‘kick’ to it.”
“Well, how about ‘Red Masker?’ You know, he masks people and stuff.”
“Man. Why didn’t I think of that? The kids are gonna love it!”
(Damn. I went off on a tangent there. Sorry.)
Captain Laser
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Here’s Captain Laser. This guy was obviously inspired by Cyclops from X-Men, but his sci-fi logo style and the word “captain” in his name makes me feel like he’s more of a Buck Rogers, sci-fi, leader kind of guy. Plus, I love how happy he looks. He’s probably the wise-cracking smart ass of the group.
(Click to enlarge)
Oh yeah, and look at this. He may be cracking a smile now, but if you cross him, he’ll laser-blast your ass. What did the innocent people in that sky rise do to deserve the laser-beamed wrath of Captain Laser? Maybe some Super Diabolics were hiding in there.
(Click to enlarge)
Next, we have the Super Diabolics. I’m actually a bit intrigued that these toylines have separate names… unless “Airgam Comics: Super Stars” is considered the toyline’s name. I dunno. Anyway, the same weird English translation thing goes for this toy title too. Love it. The style here is more reminiscent of skateboard graphics or tattoo art or something. So pointy and flamey.
(Click to enlarge)
And look at these guys. They seem a bit more unique/diverse and not so ripped-off (at first glance anyway). This montage suffers from the same weird perception of space between the characters. I like their dark and mysterious setting – surrounded by creepy castles, sharp mountain ranges and monster bats.
(Click to enlarge)
The Diabolics I have to show you today are Dr. Diabolic, Python, Piranha and Spector.
Dr. Diabolic
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
First we Have Dr. Diabolic… which basically means this guy is the leader. If you’re team is called the “Super Diabolics,” and you are doctor of Diabolics, then you are definitely the bad-ass leading the bunch. His mask only covers a part of his face for some reason, and it looks like he’s even lost an eye in battle. He kind of reminds me of Mr. Sinister from the X-men.
Python
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Up next we have Python. Which looks like a weird 70s Dracula. I love the little ’stache and stained vampire fangs. If he’s not a weird reptilian vampire, I’d say he’s a retro version of G.I. Joe’s Serpentor.
Piranha
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Here we have Piranha. I think he’s the misunderstood weirdo of the bunch. I’m sure he speaks or acts in some way that any passerby would think he’s “special needs.” He looks pretty cool. Looks like a cross between an alien and a fish man. Good to see he has a trident instead of the guns everyone else seems to love so much.
Spector
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
Oh. And my favorite of the bunch – Spector. He’s definitely the scary, mysterious loner who answers to no one. Question: What’s more bad ass than a guy with a skull for a head? How about a guy with a skull head wearing a futuristic leather space suit. What’s cooler than a skull-headed guy wearing a futuristic leather jumpsuit? How about a skull-headed guy wearing a leather jumpsuit toting around a big blaster. This guy has to be an undead space biker. He could’ve been inspired by Ghost Rider.
That’s all the characters for now, but we’re not done yet.
Not only were these little guys cool, but they had huge freaking playsets.
(Click to enlarge)
Here are a couple of playsets that were featured on the back of the packaging. Looks like a city playset with a giant spider web, and a big glowing bad guy along with the castle playset. The castle is kind of wonky and more fantasy-inspired than these comic characters. Just look at these things. Sure they’re just cardboard cutouts, but they seem like they could’ve been pretty fun.
Playsets not cool enough for you? Well, in these pics you can see a lot of these guys had alternative figure versions which came with their own personally-branded vehicles. Looks like they had various airplanes, motorcycles and hovercrafts.
Red Maskermobile
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
(Click to enlarge)
I happened to get my hands on this Red Masker-mobile. And boy is it a thing of beauty. Looks like a weird jetski-speedboat-hovercraft or something. Not sure if he flies this thing or sails it.
(Click to enlarge)
Also, notice the Red Masker that came with this vehicle is different than the regular one. This time his eyes are exposed, his costume’s original web patterning has devolved to a generic criss-cross design, and now, he has his name written across his chest (so you won’t confuse him with Spider-Man).
Panther Man and Bad Tiger
(Click to enlarge)
You may’ve noticed a couple of characters from the toy packaging that didn’t get their time in the limelight. I don’t have these figures, but I figured they needed a little mention.
Here we have the Super Fantastics’ Panther Man. He’s basically a Wolverine ripoff. They tried to throw us off a bit w/ that bow, but we know Wolverine when we see him.
And then we have the Super Diabolics’ Bad Tiger. He actually looks pretty nice. Reminds me of a character you’d see in an old Nintendo Pro Wrestling game or something.
Note that they both have an animal theme and the same color scheme. Oddly coincidental.
If you happen to have these figures or know where I can find ‘em, please get in touch with me
And lastly, I wanted to share this vintage Spanish toy commercial for the Airgam Comics: Super Stars. You know they had to be legit if they had their own toy commercial. Enjoy.
Oh man. All I can say is I love these little guys. I’m so glad I discovered them. I never knew anything about them growing up (being the little American kid I was in the 80s). Thank goodness for the internet and my buddy, John, who hooked me up with a lot of these figures. Thanks John!
Quite possibly the most horrible, disgusting, poorly-produced toy I own.
Seriously.
Look at him.
(Click to enlarge)
He’s a hairy beast, trapped in his own cobbled-together body – screaming in agony, because he’s stuck in this constant state of crappiness.
(Click to enlarge)
Seriously. The guy looks like a failed prototype of a prototype or a badly-built model kit or something.
(Click to enlarge)
Another weird thing about this monstrosity is its potent chemical smell. Not only does it stink, but the smell actually rubs off onto your hands when handling this thing. Now that’s a first in my toy collection. Even Stinkor’s stench doesn’t rub off on you.
(Click to enlarge)
And just look at this awesome toy construction. Now that’s quality.
His pieces don’t even fit together properly, and he looks like he was painted by a small child… with a poor motor skills… using a partially-crusted, dry brush from a bottle of white-out.
I know this is a bootleg possibly produced using child labor, but c’mon! Teach those kids to paint!
(Click to enlarge)
Oh, wait! The figure came in a little plastic baggy with a header card and everything. It looks so legit now!
(Click to enlarge)
And look at the huge assortment of accessories he came with… which he can’t even use.
Wanna know why? Because most of the stuff was re-purposed from smaller toylines’ accessories – Masters of Universe, Galactic Fighters, Galaxy Warriors, and maybe a hint of Thundercats.
(Click to enlarge)
Well, at least he can hold the swords… but only in one of his hands. Wanna know why? Because the shoddy production processes left him with some much extra plastic flack all over his body, his hands are filled and closed off.
Kind of gross actually.
Well, there is one saving grace to this figure – that custom package header. Let’s take a closer look.
(Click to enlarge)
Not bad. I mean it’s crappily printed and all, but it looks awesome. It’s actually an original piece of art – hand-drawn typography and semi-sloppy comic art style. A lot of artists and designers strive for this look. You’d normally expect to see re-purposed packaging art from the original toyline on these Mexican bootlegs. I really like the personality of this piece (I even made it into a desktop wallpaper for you.).
I wonder what the original toyline was. I’m guessing it’s Thundercats. My first clue was the title “Thunder Cast Villanos.” Ha! Plus I recognize some of the characters in the artwork. (From left to right) Looks like we have Monkian, Slithe (who looks freakin’ great!), Mumm-Ra… and ummm… some wolf guy (is that supposed to be Jackalman?) and… uh… is that Golem from Lord of the Rings? Looks like Vultureman on the bottom though.
(Click to enlarge)
So, there you have it. The most disgusting Monkian bootleg you’ll ever see, and the crappiest bootleg toy I’ve ever owned (and the greatest wedding gift – thanks Jason!)
Wow.
If you’re one of those folks who’s not even sure who Monkian is, or what the original toy looks like, here’s a pic for you.
I actually had the original figure as a kid. I liked him well enough, but he was never really as cool as all the He-man figures I had him surrounded by.
