Archive for the ‘Ugly’ Category

Madballs 2007

Sunday, November 25th, 2007

So all those who lost the Madballs they had as kids (and even those who kept their Madballs just to realize they’d disintegrate over time), fret no further. They’re back!

You remember Madballs. They actually had success in the mid 80s, combining the gross-out character style of Garbage Pail Kids and the playability of a ball. Well, it’s 20 years later and some of your old favorites are back and have been redesigned to be even more disgusting.

MadballsSeries 1 Toy Package
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Madballs 2007 - Screamin' Meemie - toy package

The modern Madballs are brought to us by Basic Fun and American Greetings (freaky huh?). Each series has 5 classic characters from the original 80s line with the addition of a new modern character. The characters available in this first series are the ever-popular Screamin’ Meemie, Skull Face, Bash Brain (known as Crack Head back in the day), Repvile, Slobulus and Horn Head.

Screamin’ MeemieShatters glass by screaming like a little girl.
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Madballs 2007 - Screamin' Meemie - Gross ball toy

Skull FaceThe bare bones minimum. And that’s on a good day.
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Madballs 2007 - Skull Face - Gross ball toy

Bash BrainBrains and brawn: He has neither.
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Madballs 2007 - Bash Brain - Gross ball toy

RepvileFair Warning: Does not make a good pet.
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Madballs 2007 - Repvile - Gross ball toy

Slobulus - Gross. Vile. Disgusting. Lacks Vision. ‘Nuff said?
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Madballs 2007 - Slobulus - Gross ball toy

Horn HeadJust cranky enough to bully the bullies.
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Madballs 2007 - Horn Head - Gross ball toy

These toys are foam rubber balls like the originals, but there’s another new Madballs series called Madballs Sick. They are slightly larger rubber balls that reveal gross gags when you squeeze ‘em. Bulging eyes, pulsing brains, oozing blood and all that kind of stuff. Here’s a shot I found online (I don’t like them that much, that’s why I’m only presenting the classic foam rubber ones).

Madballs Sick - Slobulus' Bulging Eyeball

What I’ve enjoyed even more than the new Madballs is the Madballs Central blog started by Madball artist, James Groman. Here’s a taste of some of the awesome sketches and paintings he’s posting on the site (I wish the toys turned out as well as his original artwork).

Madballs Concept art by james Groman

Zombie Puberty

Tuesday, October 30th, 2007

It’s that time of year again. What time is that you ask? Halloween of course. What better way to celebrate than with a thematic entry for such a spooky day.

You’ve seen one zombie, you’ve seen ‘em all, right? Wrong.

Look at this guy. He’s all f-ed up.

Naked,
Green,
Covered with juicy, candy-coated sores,
Oozing puss

… and he’s balding.

It’s tough being an awkward, teenage zombie – living (or is that un-living) in a state of a pimply puberty. Even his eye and navel are oozing. Poor kid.

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Hideshi Hino - Zowruko Horror Zombie Toy by Planet Toys

He’ll never know the taste of a woman’s brain.

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Hideshi Hino - Zowruko Horror Zombie Toy by Planet Toys

So, running a blog dedicated to “weirdo toys,” pretty much means I can virtually feature anything from my collection for this “special” Halloween edition. I finally decided to feature this little fella I bought a couple of years ago. Unfortunately, I trashed his packaging, so I have no record of what he is (it’s before I knew I’d be doing this blog ;) ). I think a friend informed me that he’s part of a series of figures based on freaky zombie characters by some Japanese illustrator. At the moment, I have no info other than “Planet Toys Made in China”, but I’m working on it.

INFO UPDATE:

Thanks to some information from Jonathan at www.bogleech.com, I now know that this weird toy is a character from the mind of horror manga artist, Hideshi Hino. His name is Zowroku, and he belongs to a toyline that includes two other Hino characters, Hell Baby and Dokumushi (the “Bug Boy”).

Hideshi Hino - Hell Baby and Bug Boy Horror Comics

I also found some images of the toy packaging. I knew I shouldn’t have thrown it away.

Hideshi Hino - Zowruko Horror Zombie Toy by Planet Toys

Captain Cavewoman?

Monday, October 8th, 2007

So, I found this nappy, scraggly, disgusting piece of plastic at a flea market years ago. Funny thing is, this little lady looks like she might actually have fleas.

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A weird cavewoman finger puppet toy

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A weird cavewoman finger puppet toy

It seems like she’s a finger-puppet or something (the ugliest finger-puppet a mother can buy but a finger-puppet nonetheless).

She looks like she could be E.T.’s mom. Look at her! She’s a chubby E.T. with hair, boobs, and a furry dress.

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A weird cavewoman finger puppet toy

My only clue to what she is is the fine print on her posterior that reads © Anjar 1989. I’ve currently been unable to find any details about caveman finger-puppets.

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A weird cavewoman finger puppet toy

I know when I bought this thing, it reminded me of the old Nintendo game, “Caveman Games.” It was basically prehistoric versions of the Olympic Games. Fun stuff.

Caveman Games screenshot
Caveman Games screenshot
Caveman Games screenshot

… Much better than recent caveman entertainment. Like those Geico commercials that have “evolved” into a crappy show on ABC (I haven’t seen it. I’m just making assumptions and talking trash.) I remember the good ol’ days of caveman entertainment: The Flinstones, Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer, Captain Caveman, Caveman (the movie), Encino Man… well, maybe it wasn’t so great afterall.